Did She Run Out Of Self-Tanner?

Shock! For once Katie Price does not look like an orange creamsicle cake. In fact, she looks rather nice. I even like the shoes.

Ha! This impostor doesn't fool me! The real Katie Price would have showed up fully bathed in self-tanner and whoreishness.

The Tantastic Jordan Returns!!!

Now there's the Jordan I know. I don't know who that imposter was, but it's good to see the ol' Katie Price back. The use of a white bra with a black sweater can only be pulled off by a classic beauty such as Jordan.

Here she is at Cardiff, Wales, doing a book signing for "Katie Price: Pushed to the Limit". The originality of her book title just blows me away.

Where In The World Is Katie Price?

No, that is not Susan Lucci in her glory days. It's Katie Price at her book signing for "Jordan: Pushed to the Limit". I didn't even know she was writing a book. Wait a minute, I didn't know she did other things outside of getting plastic surgery.

Who are you and what have you done with my Jordan? The real Jordan would never write a book. In face, she looks more like this:

Not Satisfied Just Yet

Katie Price aka Jordan is not pleased with the size of her breasticles. The Sun reports that she had wanted them from a 32G to a 32C, but they only went down one size, which is 32F. Even the doctors were protesting her breast reduction. Oh, they're so clever!

"Despite her setback, Jordan and hubby PETER ANDRE are intent on hanging on to her old implants. But the reasons are more financial than sentimental.

She revealed to OK magazine: "They're in our safe.

"I'm going to sell them for £1million, and give 10 per cent to charity."

Ten percent? Jordan, no need to go crazy there.

Source: The Sun

Peter Andre Misses Katie's Boobies

Now that I look at this picture, I kind of miss them too. Breasts are beautiful, but less is more. It's a pain in the ass the have big boobs. I speak from experience. As you may already know, Katie Price aka Jordan got a breast reduction back in December. Since then, she's done some other shit to her face, but that is not important. It's all about the chesticles.

"The cheesy ex-pop star got all teary-eyed while reminiscing about his wife's legendary mammaries.

He reveals meeting Jordan, real name Kate Price, kick-started his love of boobs.

He said: "I used to think just a little more than a handful was plenty enough and I was simply into legs and bums, but Katie and her amazing boobs changed my mind, big time."

It's disappointing to me that most guys are ass men. There are hardly any boob men out there. It sucks for me because I lack in the booty department. It's all gone to my chest. *sigh* One day, Cin, one day.

Click here for the NSFW version of the above pic.

Source

Katie Price Needs Translation

Katie & Pete: Unleashed is coming to stores near you! This time, there will be something different. Katie Price's lines will have subtitles.


"The couple’s show, Katie & Pete: Unleashed now comes complete with subtitles - because viewers were having trouble understanding the 29-year-old glamor model’s Essex accent.

Jordan - real name Katie Price - is incomprehensible but hubby Peter Andre, 34, comes across better and doesn’t need to be subtitled."

I doubt anyone who saw that show was interested what she was saying anyway. What a waste of time and energy.



Source

Katie Price Shrinks Her Ta Ta's

Jordan aka Katie Price had her size 32FF tits reduced to a healthy 32D, reports The Sun.

Thank god. Those tits looked nasty! I don't understand how a woman who is built like a tooth pick can even carry something that heavy. I'm only a 38DD and I hate them! They get in the way of everything. Even baggy shirts make me look like I'm wearing a little girls undershirt.

UPDATE: More Katie Hotness Here :)